Thursday, January 8, 2009

Thickening My Skin

The other day, a friend of mine shared something she was told when she was first venturing out into her world of being a singer-songwriter. It was something like this:
That she will have to have very thick skin. That people will say nice things that encourage her, but that they will also say hurtful things. And that the value she gives herself really shouldn't come from either place (other's opinions, whether they're positive, or negative). That the only opinion that REALLY matters is her own.

I have never had anyone say truly mean, or hurtful things to me as far as my music endeavors go. (yet) But I do have a lot of unsolicited advice that comes my way. Comments like, "You know what you really need? You need a mandolin!" or, "You need some fast songs.", or "Why don't you write a song that sounds like Jack Johnson?" They are opinions I don't agree with, but I still hear them all as, "You're not good enough."

I struggle with thickening up this thin skin of mine. But the words of another friend, helped me earlier today. He reminded me that other's opinions, advice, etc. aren't really about ME anyway. They're about them! Their need to feel important, or feel wise, or whatever. He told me to take in the things that help me, and lovingly let go of the rest.

And that is something I intend to practice...

No comments: