Monday, July 7, 2008

The Kindest Pressure

I had set (and missed) a self-imposed deadline to finish my new cd. Of course I have some excuses, but ultimately, they're all pretty lame. There must be something I fear about finally being finished with it or something.

Every now and then, I'll get an email from some kind person asking me how much longer until it's for sale. And I LOVE them for asking! For caring about it at all! And not one single person has said it in a way that made me feel criticized from my lateness. So I've felt flattered, more than pressured.

The other day while I was playing, there was someone listening to me that has a copy of my last cd. So she asked me when my next one would be "out". I told her I was running a bit behind but I thought around a month should be good. So she asked if she could give me the money for it now, and I could just send it to her when it's finished. My gut instinct told me NOT to take her money- Not until I had a actual product to sell her. But she encouraged me to take her money, and so I thought, "Well, yes. Maybe this is just what I need. I will feel sort of like a thief, or at least a fraud, if I just keep her money without sending her a cd within about a month."

Di is her name. And she did me the biggest favor. Now I don't just have a self-imposed deadline. I've got product owed to someone who has already put down their money. I've got a little but of pressure to knuckle down and finish this cd that is really so ready to be let loose out into the world!

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