Thursday, April 26, 2007


A friend of mine told me she had boxed up about 100 hundred pounds of self-help books to donate. Being a glutton for the self-help genre I asked her if I could come over and look thru them.

Proudly, I will say I only walked away with a few. And actually once I really sat down to look thru them once I got home, there was only one that I will read. AM reading, actually. It's an older book. You may have heard of it. Wishcraft.

The books goal is to help you determine WHAT you want, and then it lines you up to get what you wish for. Sounds easy enough. I'll bite.

It has lots of exercises you're suppose to do. Which I like. But I found that when I'm in reading mode, I'm not in writing or project mode and I think to myself "...yeah. Uh huh. Good idea. I should go back and do that later." But then I'm not really doing them. However, I've been thinking a LOT about one.

And this was it: Think back to when you were a very young child. WAY back. As far back as you can remember. What did you just naturally love to do? The further back the better because once you got a little older, say school age, what you like got beaten out of you and you conformed to what was the "right" thing to do instead.

My gut reaction as I first started thinking about it, above all else was, "DAMN...I wish I could call Mom." She would help me brainstorm, and she'd probably remember it better than me. Especially memories of when I was a teeny kid. After sulking and feeling sorry for myself that I can't call her, I just started thinking on my own.

And one memory led to the next. And all of the sudden, I had a mental list of lots of stuff. Singing into a tape recorder. That thing was my best friend. I sang into it, I interviewed my family and friends. I did weird experiments with it like I'd record myself eating different chips and see if it sounded different on the outside. Cheetos, Doritoes, etc. Fascinating stuff. Once I got strong enough (and determined enough) I loved re-arranging the furniture in my room. I loved organizing even tho I was typically a slob. I couldn't keep things neat, but I loved the process of organizing! I also loved coloring and making pictures out of my light-bright. I never played with Barbies, but I loved giving any doll I ever found a haircut. All dolls I had wound up with ultra short hairstyles very quickly.

And it's true, as the book said, those are some of the things I'm really interested in. The crunchy noises chips make most of all.

Anyway, I'll keep thinking about this stuff. It's fun to reminisce, even just inside my head! And maybe I'll figure out some deep rooted talents and passions that I had forgotten I had.

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