Friday, November 30, 2012

Close To Me

I'm going to try to make this brief, since typing these days takes me about 5 times longer than usual, and comes with a certain amount of discomfort.  But I really wanna tell this, so here goes...

Earlier this week, I had to get a little surgery on my hand.

Although it wasn't a big deal, I was nervous.

While I was in  the pre-operating "holding" room, I was around lots of other patients also waiting their turn for surgery.  Most of them had someone there with them, but I had Fermin just wait up in my room because it seemed silly to have him come down with me, and he had calls he had to make for work.

But like Tom Petty says, "The waiting is the hardest part..."- All the waiting got me really nervous.  And my face usually gives my feelings away.

There was a woman there, about the age my mom would be, waiting with her husband who was about to undergo double knee replacement surgery.  She came over and started talking with me.  Nothing really so profound.  She was just helping me pass the time and calm down a bit.  I don't even really remember what it was we talked about. But the profound part was, she tucked the covers in around me and gently patted me on the shoulder.  Just like Mom would have.  When it was time for the surgeons to roll her husband off to surgery we said our goodbyes.  I thanked her for talking to me, and told her I felt better already because of her.  And that she reminded me a little of my Mom.

Later that night, I had a dream about Mom.  It was present day, she wasn't sick like she usually is when I dream of her, and we were shopping at estate sales together.  She grabbed the basket with the things I intended to buy and said, "Here, give me that!  I'm buying that for you."  It seemed so real.  It was just like so many days Mom and I have spent together.

The next morning, (in real life) I was at an estate sale and saw this music box:
It looked similar to a few Mom had given me-- (I have a big collection of all sorts of music boxes, mostly all given to me by her.)  I wound it up and of course, it played "Close To You" by the Carpenters.  That song has huge sentimental value to me-  Mom used to sing it to me all the time when I was a little kid.  Anytime I hear it, I think of her.

all the bear music boxes given to me by Mom
I'm always looking for signs that Mom is still around me.  This wasn't just one little thing.  This was her making it very clear she's still close to me when I need her.


Anonymous said...

Slight coincidence..I bought carpenters greatest hits this week. I'm unpacking and have come across many things that remind me of her. I thought it would feel good to listen to that cd while unpacking. Glad she's well now in your dreams. And, hope you are feeling well after your surgery!

ally K said...

Kerri, that is such a tender story. There certainly is something to those special moments. So glad your mom gave you so many right when you needed them. xo

Valerie said...

I love that story and that your mom's presence gives you comfort. Hope you're healing well!